Our financial personality and how we were brought up plays a major role in shaping your attitudes and beliefs about personal finance.  You and your spouse were likely brought up differently.  There are a number of different financial personality types which can be described by how money is handled, how planning is done, and who pays the bills. 

The Miser

The miser usually pays cash for everything.  They pay the bills and keep the books.  Money is power, and so the miser is in control.  The family never talks about money, and there is no financial planning as a family.  The family also never knows where they are financially--only the miser knows.

The Spender

The spender’s motto is shop ’til you drop.  The spender always feels that things will work out, so there is no need to plan.  There is no budgeting or planning for major purchases, and no planning for the future.  The spender joked that if he/she can’t take it with them when they die, then they are not going! 

The Unequally Yoked

The unequally yoked use money for control.  They only give the spouse a little money each week—the spouse has to ask whenever they want anything else.  Among unequally yoked couples the purse is power.  They are not equal partners and there is no planning for the future—there is no planning at all.  If planning does occur, it is most likely contentious.

The Selfish Provider

The selfish provider says that because they earned the money, it is their privilege to decide where the money went.  The spouse has to ask whenever they need money.  There are no goals, no budget, and or plan for large purchases or future retirement or education.  The selfish provider will provide.  They are not equal partners and there is no planning for the future.

The Sleeper

The sleeper always feels that disasters and crisis happen to others, not us.  “We pay tithing--it’s like guaranteed insurance. . .”.  Wrong.  .  Throughout history, many of the great and noble ones have suffered many hardships.  Paying tithing does not insulate us from challenges and hardships, because that’s where our character is developed.  The sleeper does not need to plan, because things always work out.  There is no planning and no communication of goals and objectives because of a belief that goals and objectives aren’t needed.

The Wise Steward

The wise steward always pays the Lord first, and themselves second.  They save a part of everything they earn.  They share basic financial information with their family, including with their children as their children become of age.  They keep depreciating assets for a long time, such as cars.  They plan for the future, they save in the present, and they teach their children to do the same.

What can be done?

Understanding financial personality types is an important step in becoming one as a couple.  Recognize that you and your spouse grew up differently.  Accept it and work on becoming a wise steward together.  While you cannot control how you were brought up, you can control how you will work together.

Work together as equal “Christ-like” partners to become wise financial stewards.  Work through communication and the development of common goals.  Know what you both want to accomplish in life and work together as a team.  While we cannot control the type of examples we had as children, we can control the example we will be to our children.