FREE online courses on Getting Along with People - The Art of Getting Along
With People - Listen to People
John MacDonald while emphasizing the importance of the listening to people,
thus, tells of his friend Meyer,
'Who acquires people as easily as a hairy dog picks up bones. He smiles and
listens carefully, and the little blue eyes gleam with good
humor, and personal interest.
He says the right thing at the right time and surprising often the random
stranger tells him things he would not tell a blood relative or a psychiatrist.
No bore, no matter how classic, ever manages to bore Meyer. It is a great
talent, to be forever interested in everyone. As Mizner once said, 'a good
listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a white he knows something.
When we listen to people, they begin to like us - they begin to move closer to
us. To be successful here, however, we must observe certain things:
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Do not grab the conversation
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Do not overtalk
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Do not interrupt
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Do not criticize
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Do not argue
You simply focus attention on the other person as an act of caring and concern.
When you listen to any two persons talking, usually each is concerned about his
own ideas, feelings. To get along with people, give up your pre-occupation with
yourself - living in your own world - and pay total attention to the other
person.
When I was attending the marriage reception of my friend's daughter recently. I
had an interesting encounter with a well-known Professor from Indian Institute
of Management. My initial remarks about wedding, reception could barely elicit
an audible nod. To break the ice, I said "professor, I have gone through your
latest title on Managerial Excellence recently. It is one of the best on the
subject, written by an Indian - keeping the Indian
corporate experiences in the background." He turned to me immediately, his eyes
glowing with interest and said " I must thank you for complimenting my work, let
me tell you more about how my initial ideas got crystallized in the form of a book." For the next 90 minutes he regaled with
all the multi-farious details of his writing skills. Though this was a bit
unbearable for me, I was genuinely interested in him. When the reception came to
an end, the professor thanked me profusely for being such a wonderful conversationalist! All I had done was to make a brief comment about his writing
abilities. When you show concern, listen patiently and fully, you would
certainty leave a mesmerizing impact on the other
person! You would be remembered
for a long long time! Next encounter, you would meet as
close friends, not as one-time strange acquaintances.
