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- COUNSEL
We bring the whole of ourselves into the workplace,
nanobytes
of information/experiences/situations and problems, all competing with work
priorities, mortgages, bills, deadlines, bad vibes at work, stress…all co-exist
in unhappy, incompatible juxtaposition. We need someone
to talk to, share, someone to give advice.
There are fewer people better positioned for this than
the boss! Some bosses are
experts at this; especially those in high-risk areas…remember how Richard Crenna
cradles Sylvester Stallone (Rambo) in the closing
scenes of ‘First Blood'.
That's
real caring and counseling!
It can make all the difference.
Contrast this with the attitude of Detective Inspector
Harry Callahan's boss in ‘Sudden Impact'. After a bloody shootout, he tells Callahan and his
.44 mgm Smith & Wesson to take a vacation!
“People”, he yells, “have a habit of getting
dead around you”. Now that
is what counseling is NOT!!
Counseling
techniques can also be used pro-actively as a means to remove
hurdles to development, defuse conflicts, reassure, clarify or just motivate.
Other situations
where counseling may be necessary, would include:
-
Formal appraisal interviews
-
Career/ home conflicts/ ‘stuck' managers
-
Stress/ alcoholism (Remember Nicholas Cage in his Oscar-winning role in
“Leaving Las Vegas”).
-
Before/ after promotions
- After
major disappointments/ successes
There are three
basic ways in which we approach the task of helping people:
We can tell them what to do
We can coach them
We can counsel them
Our authority-positions can be both inhibiting and
encouraging, depending on uncertain human nature and…your motive. You have to be genuinely interested in your
subordinate's welfare…they can spot insincerity a mile off!
Select a peaceful, neutral venue without any unpleasant associations for either
of you. Create a relaxed, informal atmosphere. Do not take notes, unless you
want to look like a cop. The task
at hand can be tackled in four stages:
Identifying the problem: ‘Talk him down' like an air traffic controller ‘talks down' an
aircraft in trouble. Perhaps the
actual problem lies deeper, and what you see is only its surface projection.
Even if no solution presents itself, don't criticize, no fake advice …and sum it
up to make it smaller. It may be a dilemma, and you will need to be careful not
to upset him.
Accepting feelings: As you discuss the problem, keep
asking how he is feeling, reinforcing the past with present (better) experience,
subtly superimposing genuine ‘support' feelings over the negative ones. Keep the
focus on the person, yourself maintaining a low profile.
Exploring Alternatives: Encourage
them to identify alternate responses to the problem. You are now directing/
provoking / encouraging them to let them reach into internal, subconscious or
hidden resources to decide on a direction…but don't try to out-direct Cameron or
Spielberg.
Making the Decision: He has to do it by himself;
has to be fully committed to it because he has to implement it! No immediate solution may, however,
emerge immediately. Let it ride; don't give undue pressure to decide.
Wind Down the
session: Gently
does it'… don't let him return to earth with a bump. Counseling is not easy,
otherwise we'd all be counselors. Just talking can help let off steam and can
recharge a person's motivation to fight the problem.
QUESTION:
- What
‘counseling' means and why would you, as a manager, need to learn the
techniques of counseling? Explain the link between counseling and productivity.
- When do you counsel? Is your's a reactive or a
pro-active approach to this important function?
What are the stages involved? Would you like to attempt a case study to
illustrate the matter further? How much job satisfaction is involved for the
manager?
